Christmas time in May!

Hey guys, you know what's awesome? Getting great deals on clearance Christmas items! The way you go about doing this is so easy too! You just buy the Christmas items on the off season and you'll get them for practically a steal! Then come next Christmas you won't have to pay high dollar prices to decorate your lovely home! Now, it might be a little harder to find Christmas items in the month of may at your local department store, but a thrift store is always a good start! So let's see here... Need a Christmas tree?



Oh um... So that's a Christmas tree found at the Salvation Army, huh? Maybe it's not so bad... Let's take a good look, shall we?

-It's pre-lit. That's always a plus... But the lights are tangled.
-It's able to stand upright... But it is missing the upper half...
-It's green! It has that going for it!

Yeah... I don't know. Is it really worth the 10 dollars? I think Charley Brown may have one upped this sorry tree.

Tied up books...

These books must have been so crappy that they couldn't even untie them, sort them, and price them... It was quicker and cheaper to give you the whole lot for $1.00. But look at what you get! I'm sure you can't find information this up-to-date about Jesus just anywhere!

Another Reject Art Project

Let's hope little Timmy never walks into this Good Will and sees his masterpiece made especially for mommy in this craptastic store! His tears falling may prove to be more devastating than these deformed lizard creations.

The Mug Blob.

Who needs those fancy Denny's mugs when you can just drink from a turd mug? Seriously, someone kindly explain to me what this is supposed to be. And what's with the nose? All I'm getting from that is some demented Pinnochio offspring gone wrong...

The South will rise again!

Yeah... I'm thinking not. Not with all this crap ending up in every thrift store you visit.

The Mystery is solved.

You may remember back to this entry: http://thriftstorenightmares.blogspot.com/2009/05/its-more-of-mystery-than-nightmare.html

Baby Jesus... Why is he always missing? Where does he go to? Who in their sick, twisted mind would steal such a famous religious figure?

Well, apparently he's not gone for good because baby Jesus always turns up somewhere. In this case, the Salvation Army holds him hostage.

At least that mystery is solved! Now if only we could figure out how to rid the nasty, dingy thrift store smell from all items purchased there...

Tacky, tacky, tacky

Here we've got four, count 'em, four eagles and an America Mountain.

Army Bear

Something tells me Sgt. Snuggles here won't be marching into combat any time soon with that gimpy leg. And we all know where this bear got that gimpy leg, too... A fat kid who was a little too old to be playing with teddy bears smashed it in six places. The doctors all say the bear may walk again, but he's going to need years of painful surgery and physical therapy.

Stamp nightmare

Someone loved this postage stamp of a mad black woman so much that they couldn't help themselves from having it encased in plastic. I'd kick myself if this thing were worth like $300 on ebay and I didn't buy it for $.90 when I had the chance.

The Newest State

As a resident of Gllinois, I'm glad the person who painstakingly painted this one-of-a-kind Gllinois commemorative plate lovingly captured all of the things I love about Gllinois. Not only is Abe Lincoln's slightly retarded Gllinoian brother Lester pictured, but a depressing city, a phallic structure, a rickety shack in the middle of nowhere, and a dilapidated government building all fit in quite nicely. These are just some of the amazing things you'll see on your next trip to Gllinois.