Ah cassette players... This brings me back...

Remember the simple days when no Ipods or mp3 players existed? CDs were barely even in the making... But there were cassettes and you were the coolest kid on the block if you had a decent cassette player.

I'd imagine this one wouldn't do much for you though...



Take a close look. Something is missing... Something quite important.

No eject/open button!? Okay, that can't be right... Sadly though, it is. After battling this cassette player in disbelief for a few minutes, j-on and myself have determined that there is no physical way to open this cassette player aside from breaking it open. There is no hidden trick. No plugging it in and it magically opening... No pushing the cassette door to open it... Hell, that baby is solidly built and solidly shut! I can just imagine the horror glued across that one 80s kid who received this as a gift only to be defeated by this evil machine. He would not become the cool kid on the block. Instead he would be known as the boy who has a cassette player, but is too stupid to have one that actually accepts tapes...

I'd hope there was something we were missing, but it doesn't appear as so. And even if we did miss some random way of opening this horrid device, should it really be that difficult to open!?

I rest my case.

Best Sound System Ever!

Come on, you know you want to buy this...

After reviewing this picture I came upon a couple of facts.

1. Thrift stores really WILL take anything.

2. There is a such thing as overpriced garbage.

3. Apparently hobos have items to donate as well.

I wonder if this thing actually does work...

-k8

I don't know about you...

But I think these two items were just meant to be sold together...

And


I mean, if you got into a guy's car and saw that shirt, wouldn't you expect for him to have that car cassette player? And if you got into a guy's car and saw that car cassette player, wouldn't you expect to find him wearing that outrageous shirt?

-k8

The Endless Nightmare

Exploring thrift stores may look exciting and glamorous, but the reality is that it requires persistence and patience. It can be a lot of fun, but for the most part consists of this:


Look at all of this worthless crap. In this picture alone, there's a broken inkjet printer, a crappy portable TV from the 80's, salad shooter, an answering machine with a missing power adapter, a VHS rewinder, a broken night light, a cassette-only boom box with a broken antenna and a damaged power cord, a "Texas Hold 'Em" TV Poker with the contents of the box strewn around the shelf, and a box of light bulbs from the 70's. This is only a minor preview of all of the shit you have to sift through to find a thrift store nightmare.

Usually though, the best items almost literally jump out at you, so in the grand scheme of things it all balances out.

-j-on

[EDIT: I think I got a disease from this thrift store.]

For the love of god...

Look at this latest monstrosity that turned up in a relatively seedy thrift store in the next town over. I'm guessing that when faced with a failing career as a fat annoying loudmouth, ol' Rosie figured she'd cash in on her last shreds of popularity and create this unholy likeness. It's not even a very good likeness; they forgot to add about 300 pounds. And yes, you're reading that right, it's a talking Rosie doll. Thankfully, the voice box was broken, but when I hit the switch it emitted a tormented, digitized groan, something I'd compare to a lion choking on a bowling shoe or a demon with asthma.

As an added bonus, I found this obsolete piece of trash:


Gee, I wonder if the that thing can get the internet!!!1 Seriously, though, I don't know if it's more sad that this thing is taking up space in the store or that they want $20 for it.

-j-on